8 Things I Dislike about Brazil

Hi all!

Last week I wrote about 8 things I love about Brazil. But Brazil, like anywhere else, is not perfect. Here are a few of the things that I would change if I were in charge:

1. Waiting in line.  Virtually always there is a line at the grocery store, bank, or any governmental agency. Native Brazilians accept this with an aplomb that I can’t fathom. Hire more people or improve the process to speed things up! I am more patient than I used to be, but waiting 20 minutes in the grocery “express lane” is exasperating. Maybe a personal shopper isn’t such a ridiculous idea…

2. Things just take a bit longer.  Similar to Irritation #1 above, but this extends beyond simply waiting in line. Processes just take longer here. They often seem ill defined, and the functionary handling your case often seems empowered to make arbitrary decisions based on his/her mood or whimsy, so grit your teeth and smile. Displaying frustration is considered rude, even if you are dealing with an idiot who is following a ludicrous, arcane, and obsolete process. Raising your voice or even appearing a tad frustrated will only give the functionary an excuse to move your request to the bottom of the pile.

You may suspect by my tone, that I have experienced Brazilian bureaucracy. You would be correct in your suspicions.

I began to write about a couple of examples, but I saw that my anecdotes were becoming a bit lengthy, so I shall put my comments aside for now and bring them to you later in a rant about Bureaucracy, Brazilian style. Let us only say that, if bureaucratic nonsense were an Olympic event, Brazil would bring home the gold every time.

3. Corruption. Skimming and corruption are ingrained in the culture here. As a tourist or casual businessperson here, you likely wouldn’t notice it. But that cumbersome system you find at the pharmacy, where one person helps you select your purchases and gives you a quasi-receipt, but then a second actually accepts your cash, makes change, and gives you a true receipt? All that is designed to prevent pilfering and skimming. All customers have to deal with these cumbersome systems because people are poorly paid and therefore prone to graft, and the culture traditionally has accepted it.

As one example, three friends and I were stopped by cops late one night when returning from Lapa. The cops flagged down the taxi we were in, without doubt because two of us were obviously gringos.  As soon as eye contact was made, I knew we would be waved to stop, and we were. The cops emptied our pockets, only to be disappointed that we were not carrying anything illicit that they could use to elicit a bribe. Even less honest cops might have planted something.

4. Crime. I want to say right up front that of course crime exists in Rio and in Brazil, but not to the degree you would think from television and the papers. And most crime is petty theft. Yes, it occurs. But I would sooner walk in downtown Rio after dark than in downtown Atlanta, without question, and I’ve lived in both cities.

It’s like this: There are poor here. If you walk around sporting jewelry or an expensive cell phone or new iPod, you are going to attract attention and make yourself a target. Why would you do that? And why would you choose to flaunt your wealth in front of people who have little?

5. Disparity of income and classism. Perhaps the major reason for crime here is simply lack of other opportunities. People, primarily young males, steal to survive.

I believe that as the middle class in Brazil continues to grow we will see crime continue to decrease. But to really address the problem, Brazil needs systemic changes, not band-aid programs, to create jobs of real value, real alternative opportunities. Make it easier to do business here, and encourage foreign investment. That will bring in jobs and opportunities, which will greatly reduce crime.

6. Lack of respect for pedestrians. Classism rules on the streets here. If I have a car, I must have money, and you are on foot, so maybe you don’t. In the Latin world, the driver always has the right of way. That’s it. You’ve been warned. Look both ways.

7. Ceaseless fascination with soccer. Soccer is a stupid game in which virtually nothing actually happens. There’s lots of commentary, and shouting and screaming among the fans. But if the final score is 3-2, that’s a high-scoring game. Most games aren’t even decided outright, but by stupid penalty kicks.

OK, American football is at least as stupid.  But at least it doesn’t go on year-round. Call me a stupid American, fine. I’d rather watch college hoops any day.

8. This toilet paper thing. You aren’t supposed to flush the toilet paper here. In most bathrooms you’ll find a little wastebasket next to the toilet. You are supposed to wad up and deposit used toilet paper into this wastebasket. My first time here, I stayed with the family of a friend. My friend took me aside to tell me about this neat little custom. I was – “horrified” may not be too strong a word. While I am more or less used to it now, no one has yet been able to explain why I shouldn’t flush the toilet paper – and perhaps I don’t want to know.

Brazil isn’t perfect. But it has charm. And while much of the northern hemisphere is struggling with economic problems, among others, Brazil is definitely on the upswing. It’s a good place to be right now. The future looks bright.

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